Friday, November 13, 2009

Fists of blood, heart of Dragon: reviews of the "Bloodfist" saga

Bloodfist [*]
I think “Bloodfist” is a better effort than director Terrence H. Winkless’ own “Rage and Honor,” which is pretty deficient on both rage and honor, because it has both blood and fists. However, the film still fails to live up to any expectations you may want to impose on it by virtue of its title: I think it would be nifty if this movie were about lesbian kickboxers because a bloodfist sounds both painful and sexy at the same time, but it’s only about regular kickboxers and martial artists. Lame.

Don “the Dragon” Wilson plays a guy named Jake whose brother was killed in Manila not long after killing his opponent in a martial arts tournament. Jake goes to Manila to claim the body (which has already been cremated) and he meets up with an old friend who looks like the Todd from “Scrubs” and has a real gift for making me think that he was semi-retarded for the first half of the movie. He also meets an old trainer named Kwong (Joe Mari Avellan) whose brother died in the tourney and they become friends. He looks like Sammo Hung, but his English is great so he isn’t really in the business of spitting out platitudes instead to get them to spar seriously he tells Todd that Jake fucked his sister all afternoon. He’s a classy guy.

Jake will find his brother’s killer by entering a martial arts tournament and having the killer revealed to him in time. A move that begs the question(s): How many tournaments and how often do they have them in Manila? Would you be pissed if the guy who killed your brother was actually a guy that you beat with one punch? It doesn’t happen but wouldn’t it be a real motherfucker of an anti-climax? The front-runner is a guy named Chin Woo (Chris Aguilar) who hails from the mean streets of Vietnam, kills everyone he fights and eats flies when they have the audacity to come near him. He’s like a less imposing version of Bolo from “Bloodsport” and he even has a scene where he stomps on some guy’s face to finish him off then pulls his bandana off and screams in triumph.

The tournament aspect of “Bloodfist” is pretty lackluster, none of the fights are fun, people just flail about until someone gets hit. Winkless has a gift for misusing people with natural abilities, for example, the most engaging thing about Billy Blanks is his Afro-mullet.

There are some small touches I like here and there, though. Experienced fighters pulling their punches and running a con on people in a public place usually to gain information but sometimes to steal money off a poker table seems like it is falling out of fashion and somebody needs to bring it back, stat. I also like some of the slow motion Winkless employs in the film— a woman doing rooftop aerobics in slow motion and during the climax when Jake’s buddy Hal reveals who the villain is in a slo-motion “NOOOOO!” voice but he explains everything about the guy.

I don’t hate “Bloodfist” but I think that Terrence H. Winkless lack of understanding of the words awesome and engaging certainly makes him the kind of martial arts filmmaker that can put a damper on the kind of sublime highs a movie like this can normally reach if your mind is open.

Bloodfist 2 [*1/2]
“Bloodfist 2” opens with Jake Raye (Don “the Dragon” Wilson, playing the same character again for the first and last time in the series history) accidentally killing his latest opponent in the ring (upon delivery of the fatal blow an announcer says, “he won’t be getting up from that anytime soon.” Hilarious, no?) and retiring from the sport of kickboxing for good. Two years later, an old pal calls him up begging for help in the Philipines saying he’s in trouble from a guy who promised to set him up with some fights. He needs help getting out of town so naturally Jake hops a plane instead of wiring him some money.

Naturally, we learn that a few other choice fighters from different disciplines have also been lured to the Philipines through invites to non-existent martial arts tournaments or calls from old friends only to be blindsided by weapon wielding thugs and forced at gunpoint onto a boat that will take them to an island paradise overseen by a businessman named Su (Joe Marí Avellan, one of two returning bad guys from the original film, both of whom play new characters).

The idea when we get there is that, Su is trying to sell a designer steroid and he needs the world’s best fighters to get their asses handed to them by his own personal handpicked rogues gallery. A gallery that includes fighter number one (Cris Aguilar, the original “Bloodfist”’s Chin Woo), guy who gets elbow dropped repeatedly and guy who gets kicked in face. Also, Jake escapes immediately after arriving on the island so he gets to sneak around and beat people up while the other fighters actually have to do a little more of that fighting for their lives business.

While I wish the “Bloodfist” films would just drop the pretense of tournaments altogether I think this is a pretty marked improvement over the first film while still failing to live up to its potential. I like how closely Jake follows behind the guards when sneaking around that it looks a little cartoonish, I also like how even for a badass hero he is capable of falling for some pretty simple tricks like running full speed through a doorway and getting hit by boards (he falls for that gem twice). I’m also beginning to see how if Jake Raye ever got lured to the Philipines for a third time he might not make it home alive.

Still, it’s nice to see all the varying disciplines on display. I personally thought the Greco Roman wrestler guy was amazing, his fighting style was the very definition of economical but he still spoke volumes when he moved. He also looked kind of squirrelly so to see him be so tough and serious was really cool. I also liked seeing Tim Baker (the father from “No Retreat, No Surrender”) not only get to do some serious ass kicking but to not come across like a pansy and an awful actor in the same breath. His IMDb bio calls him a standout member of the Japan Karate Association’s U.S. National Team and I’m inclined to believe it since he was the first person to figure out how to beat the super steroid guys and it usually entails hitting them from behind and moving way, way faster and also hitting their legs.

The tournament fighting scenes are perhaps the least cool, the final scene where everyone fights the guards outside the compound despite their tournament injuries is a better display of their skills and teamwork. A drill sargeant character fights with only one hand and gives a limping chase to the weaselly scientist who created the drug to begin with.

The first two “Bloodfist” films aren’t quite what they could’ve been, only a little in the way of fighting is memorable and they aren’t exactly inundating me with the intentional or unintentional laughs that I wanted, even the two bad guys from part one who return in this one miss the opportunity to do anything memorable the second go ‘round.

Perhaps the the third film…the only one I’ve seen more than once will hold up to the scrutiny of my fond memories.

Bloodfist III [***1/2]
“Bloodfist III: Forced to Fight” opens with some rather poignant sounding music and the image of Don “the Dragon” Wilson practicing his martial arts then it cuts to his character, Bolan taking some brutal revenge on the leader of the black prison gang for raping and murdering his only friend. An event that transpires while the warden is giving the press a tour of his state of the art correctional facility. This being an election year and all, the warden hands his dirty work off to his successor to keep things under wraps, which means there are plenty of prison fights but the reporter who saw the murder is simply going to be the reporter who saw the murder, nothing more.

After the death of Luther, the prison gang leader, his business partner Blue (Gregory McKinney) makes it his mission to take Bolan out while the white gang wants to make him an ally because he’s a good fighter and another gang still is divided by racial solidarity (most members are black, some Italian) but united by their love for TV gameshows and cook-outs. Bolan is simply trying to do his time, but people want him to take a side because they believe you can’t survive without choosing one but everybody is constantly throwing his mixed blood parentage in his face and letting him know that he isn’t welcome. So they’re constantly pushing him into corners and forcing him to fight. It’s so lopsided an affair that his best friend is dead, his only other friend is a pedophile people call Diddler (even Bolan calls him Diddler like it’s a term of endearment after Diddler is able to help save his life; he doesn’t seem to have a clue what the guy has done or maybe he doesn’t want to ask).

Director Oley Sassone gives us the creepy image of a little girl spinning around in circles during visitor’s day but filtered through Diddler’s vision we hear the tinkling of a music box and she’s wearing a blue dress and bathed in an ethereal glow. Oley doesn’t beat you over the head with this image, but he does allow this glimpse into Diddler’s psyche to stand in stark contrast to how we feel about the character as the film progresses. Most of what works about the film is derived from perception whether it’s about characters or situation.

Bolan has a cellmate named Samuel Stark (Richard Roundtree) who offers counsel to inmates and tries to tow the line with his cook out loving buddies but he causes a lot of headaches for the interim warden and when Blue and white gang leader Wheelhouse form a working relationship, Stark quickly makes an enemy out of the both of them. Stark is also seen as a distaff civil rights figure, urging people to use non-violent ways to affect change and ultimately receives a shiv to the gut for his troubles. He does, however, get a rousing moment where he talks about how our environments condition us to believe things are a certain way (i.e. Bolan is a racist for killing Luther and Luther can’t be bad news for the brothers simply because he is a brother) and that things will always be that way if we don’t bother to question them. It’s nice to see everybody on the same page and wanting to make it out of prison for a change. But that’s the power of Richard Roundtree, people listen to him and if there were women in this movie they’d probably fall all over him.

Either way, after the mediocrity of the first two films it’s nice to see some kick ass action scenes and be privy to an actual plot. I like how the title can be interpreted on multiple levels: you have no allies and everyone backs you into a corner so you’re forced to fight, you believe in certain things so you’re forced to fight and you want to do right by your friends so you’re forced to fight. “Bloodfist III” has a surprising level of social conscience, it rolls at a clip and there’s even a pretty funny scene where Wheelhouse accuses Blue and Luther of swapping spit which angers Blue a great deal. How dare you accuse Blue of swapping spit with a known butt-fucker. The audacity.

Either way, this is a good one, I recommend it highly.

Bloodfist IV [**]
So “Bloodfist IV: Die Trying” is devoid of some of the loftier goals that the third installment may or may not have been purposefully trying to achieve. It’s just about a crazy day in the life of a repo man named Danny Holt who gets beaten up by a red headed man in a bathrobe to start his day. Actually, he wins but he takes a pretty embarassing ass whoopin’. Then he goes on to repossess the wrong car that gets his co-workers and his daughter’s babysitter murdered and he comes thisclose to setting off an international incident...when a box of chocolates hiding nuclear weapons triggers ends up in his possession.

There are no two ways about it, “Bloodfist IV” is ridiculous and has a bigger scale than the other films, but it lacks an urgency of pace. It still manages the occasional surprise such as Holt finding a woman in the closet with her throat slit and the woman standing in front of him turns out to be a knife wielding assassin and not the replacement babysitter I thought she was. The knife wielding assassiness is played by Cat Sassoon, daughter of hair stylist/beauty product magnate Vidal and sister of third film director Oley, she’s not a bad fighter but the film sadly robs us of a chick fight between her and Holt’s reluctant ally, a lovable schoolteacher with a penchant for nicotine gum. Also, James Tolkan from “Back to the Future” makes an appearance as an FBI agent and Liz Torres from “Gilmore Girls” plays a cop, who in an amusing character touch, is always having her dinner delivered to crime scenes. The first time this joke plays out it works to the movie’s advantage because you see a cop exit a car with a pizza box and you think to yourself no wonder fake cops got to show up first, these motherfuckers stopped to get lunch. See for yourself, it all checks out.

It also bears mentioning that the action in “Bloodfist IV” also takes place on Holt’s daughter’s birthday so you know this is kind of a shitty party for her, but maybe not for him since he gets to be involved in everything. Gary Daniels (of “Bloodmoon” fame) and his awesome mullet get to be in the second fight of the movie and I have to admit that if you can start your day off kicking Gary Daniels’ ass then the FBI, LAPD, CIA and all these other unsavory characters that get mixed up in this business might want to consider fucking with some other blue collar joe. Maybe it’s a measure of how classy a guy Don “the Dragon” Wilson or maybe it’s a complete accident but its nice that when he fights a guy like Daniels or Billy Blanks it always ends with a double kick to the head, perhaps a declaration that he respects them and considers them to be on equal footing but also a warning that he must win anyway because it’s his movie. Whatever his reasons are I like to think that they are altruistic.

At this point, I’d be remiss not to say something about Don “the Dragon” Wilson as a performer. He’s handsome in a Dean Cain kind of way, he sounds like Michael Biehn and he’s perfectly believable as your average joe and while I certainly wouldn’t mind laughing a little more during these films I really respect his self-seriousness, why do we feel the need to keep ourselves at an ironic distance from the things that happen around us. Earnestness hasn’t gone out of fashion, Wilson is proof of that. Also, you can afford to ask Wilson to stretch a little emotive muscle—he can yell if you need him to, he’s not one of those guys like his part two cohort Timothy Baker who sounds like a complete pussy if you ask him to speak in anything above a whisper. So kudos to Don “the Dragon” Wilson for being that much more. True story: they call him “the Dragon” because he kicks hot fire.

UPDATE: Actually maybe earnestness has gone out of fashion, I’ll check and see when Wilson’s last movie was.

Bloodfist V [**1/2]
I remember when John Cusack called kickboxing the sport of the future during 1989’s “Say Anything” and then I remember him getting kicked in the face by his sparring partner Don “the Dragon” Wilson when he got distracted by the sight of his love interest Ione Skye. It is with those words in mind that I look four years into the future at 1993s “Bloodfist V: Human Target.”

I don’t think the choreography of the films showcases Wilson’s dynamism as a martial artist, but I think the films more or less live or die by some of their other elements: Wilson as a likeable, trustworthy everyman, the gradually mounting evidence that the less people there are in the cast with martial arts credentials listed under their names the better the acting might actually be and, of course, that the films aren’t unterested in taking up more than 80 or 90 minutes of your time at a stretch. These aren’t lofty goals exactly but they’re entirely achievable and you take the good with the bad. “Bloodfist V” is one of the good ones, just behind part three.

This time out the Dragon sports long hair (in the prologue) and is felled by a bullet to the head, but like Seagal he is hard to kill and wakes up a few weeks later with some serious amnesia (and a haircut) with no memory of who he once was. A woman (Denice Duff) comes in claiming to be his wife, he gets released and then the Asian assassins start coming out of the woodwork… the answers to who the Dragon is aren’t coming as easily; he’s got the name Mike Stanton but not much else to work with. The woman, a hooker (and more) offers to help him in his quest to figure out who he is. Gradually we learn Stanton was trying to prevent the sale of plutonium stolen from decomissioned nukes, he was working undercover for a Chinese gangster and, well, shit hit the fan.

Naturally, there’s a twist to the proceedings where peripheral characters like the pimp in leather gloves and the Asian assassins have much bigger roles. We even get Don Stark (Bob from “That 70s Show” as a good guy NSA agent) and Steve James to turn in great supporting work. Having never seen parts four through eight before reviewing them I can’t help but wonder if the scale is going to continue to grow to nearly global proportions. The first three films definitely had an intimacy to the character’s dilemma but now the personal shit for each of Wilson’s characters seems like it has global consequences for everyone.

Hands down, Denice Duff gets my vote as the best supporting female in the series so far. She’s cute sure but she’s also very forward and I admired that about her. It might not be the epitome of class to say “if your wife doesn’t come home soon I may just have to move in here” to a guy suffering from amnesia (whose wife may be dead for all anyone knows) but we could all do a lot worse fresh from a coma. After four sequels I still don’t understand why females who barely know Don “the Dragon” Wilson insist on following him through the fires of hell. He’s tough and handsome, but it doesn’t make them deadly and sexy. At least, he’s a gentleman and tries to warn them away. Still, Duff’s character brings the warmth and humor to the good guy equation that usually gets left out by Wilson’s dedication to stoicism.

There’s not really a hell of a lot to say about “Bloodfist V: Human Target” other than that it does it’s job, does it well and leaves me very little to complain about.

Bloodfist VI [*1/2]
Handily negating my belief that the less martial arts credentials you introduce at the beginning of a “Bloodfist” film the better it actually gets in terms of acting is the silly and tired sixth entry into the series, which by this point is a franchise in name only, a sort of “Die Hard” clone that doesn’t really die all that hard.

This time out DDW plays Corrigan, a former special forces bad ass turned military courier who must stop a Muslim terrorist faction from launching nuclear weapons after they take over a launch facility. This event naturally turns Corrigan into our John McClane, the right guy in the right place at the wrong time. It’s also all literally true because Corrigan got lost on his way to the base so he showed up ninety minutes later than he should’ve but never too late to be a hero. Corrigan also stops to bandage the leg of an injured bunny so you know he’s for real with the hero stuff.

When the bad guys invade they do so under the guise of lost tourists who then proceed to slaughter the people standing guard at the gate. One of them even wears an old man mask and lures one of the guards into the camper before shooting him in the throat. This man is not technically the man in charge, but balances of power shift when you kill the man who hired you. So as the film rolls toward the climax we see creative differences that reveal a motive: have a hell-bent Muslim who wants to blow up the western world and a former engineer/MIT grad who dresses like someone from pro-wrestling’s Nation of Domination simply wants to sieze the missiles long enough to negotiate himself a gorgeous sum of money and run off with it.

It also isn’t the film’s only double cross as Cat Sassoon of “Bloodfist IV” and “my brother directed “Bloodfist III” fame plays a secret terrorist who is sleeping with one of the men in charge of the launch keys the terrorist need to sieze to make their plan work. Cat Sassoon, once again, isn’t particularly well used as the makers of “Bloodfist” don’t understand female villains because the words “cat fight” aren’t a part of their vocabulary.

“Bloodfist VI” should be more fun to make fun of and more fun in general because it’s a “Die Hard” clone, the acting is pretty consistently awful across the board (DDW even has a guy he comically repeatedly kicks in the balls before discovering this man also has a glass jaw). And there is a blatantly ridiculously sexist general who doesn’t like the idea that a woman has come up with a plan better than blowing up the nuclear base our hero has infiltrated to fight the bad guys and stop nuclear armageddon. This is also the first of the “Bloodfist” films to feature breasts.

The movie doesn’t revel in its absurdity as much as the others or something, it’s difficult to pinpoint but maybe coming off the unexpected high of part five you occasionally get a little spoiled and someone has to pay the price. I’m not saying it’s better than I make it out to be but I’m definitely sad that part six turned out to be so underwhelming for me.

Bloodfist VII [**]
At this point, clearly the series has got to be wearing a little thin, but at least they manage to inject some class into the proceedings with the casting of Stephen Williams as a police captain leading the chase for a wrongfully accused Don “the Dragon” Wilson (really, is there any other kind?), er, Jim Trudell… ex-special forces bad-ass (again I ask, is there really any other kind?) and accidental cop killer.

The beginning of part seven starts out strong when a couple of guys try to punk Trudell and make him pay a cover charge, he waxes nostalgic about his first drink then brings them to their knees. He goes inside and we see a stage wrapped up in chicken wire. My mind began to wander and I began thinking about how cool a “Road House” type movie with Don “the Dragon” Wilson would be (no offense Patrick). The guys from outside eventually come back in looking for a fight which Trudell gives to them, but not before he sort of cozies up next to a girl (who leaves with him after the fight) who spends the (sexless) night with him then steals his car before he wakes up.

For a while this is a nice reversal of the formula because in films past any girl who gets into a car with handsome Don usually ends up a big part of his misadventures. The last females to cross Don’s path that never got into a car with him were villains and while Stephanie (the girl from the bar, real name: Jillian McWhirter) seems villainous at first she just wants to handle things her own way. Besides would you buy this movie as “WoManhunt”?

So when Jim wakes up and finds Beamer keys on his nightstand he goes back to the bar, gets in the car, finds her registration and drives to Stephanie’s home address where a dirty cop lies in wait. A struggle ensues and Jim accidentally kills the guy (one of the more pathetic cop kills I’ve ever seen, by the way) and he has both dirty and legit cops on his trail as a result.

The dirty cops are involved in a luxury car theft ring and they all came up in the same precinct house, a fact that real good cops like Stephen Williams put together when they aren’t busy trying to figure out who the hell cop killer/marathon runner/bad-ass Jim Trudell really is. Stephanie Williams is also witness to a murder committed by the dirty cops and despite being relocated by the FBI the cops managed to find her.

The film’s fights are relatively mediocre without being terrible, but I’ve said time and time again that the “Bloodfist” films rarely, if ever, get to showcase the strength of Wilson as a martial artist, his stoic hero bit is still as conistently good as it ever was or will be. Not many people can claim to trust someone based on instinct, wake up with their car stolen and still not take some time out to bitch about it. I guess the end proves him right, but neither the audience nor the character has the benefit of knowing that fact before the end.

“Bloodfist VII” starts off stronger than it ends: playing off memories, tweaking the formula just a little bit and even managing a nicely written conversation. It’s only too bad that it couldn’t be kept up.

Bloodfist VIII [zero]
After having courted near disaster at least three times before in franchise history, the folks at Bloodfist, Inc. have finally managed to consummate their relationship because this thing well and truly leaves you feeling fucked.

“Bloodfist VIII: Hard Way Out” starts off with some somber jazz and to the nostalgic feeling viewer this could symbolize the end of a journey, we know (especially all these years later) that there won’t be another sequel in name only to the Bloodfist franchise unless those “Bloodfist 2050” things I keep seeing on torrents have anything to do with these films. Even better would be if “Bloodfist 2050” was finally a realization of my lesbian kickboxer dreams, but I doubt it. Either way, the somber jazz reveals itself to be foreshadowing that we are about to have a wholly depressing experience.

It doesn’t start out in the worst possible way, in fact, it starts out in a grocery store (consider “Stone Cold,” “Alien Raiders” and “Hard to Kill” as examples of how this is a great way to start a movie), some guy pulls a gun and a patron tries to be a hero—most times it’s the main character but this time it’s just some unlucky son of a bitch who gets his neck broken. Maybe the grocery store victim being who he is sets the tone of the movie all wrong or maybe I’m just looking to rationalize the film’s precipitous fall from grace, but it never gets better than this. So this killer is in town to complete a job that should’ve been finished years ago and our buddy Don D. Wilson’s number is about to come up.

Don D. Wilson is (true to form) a former CIA/special ops bad ass turned high school math teacher whose past comes back to haunt him when Italian assassins come out of the woodwork looking for payback for a political assassination. They start by killing off his team then come looking for him. After a home invasion sequence, Cowan/MacReady seeks a little help from old friends in the CIA. Another surprise ambush later, the action switches to Ireland where Mac, his son and an old contact named Danielle (Jillian McWhirter of “Bloodfist VII”) start looking for answers with the help of an old rich Irish friend.

I don’t have to tell you that there is a double cross afoot because every “Bloodfist” has them except part three which is all the better for it. I also, don’t have to tell you who does it because the people who look precisely like slick, oily untrustworthy sons of bitches are exactly the ones who do it. By this point in the movie I think MacReady and the assassin from the beginning Carlo Gianini (for all the subtlety of that name I’d call him Gepetto) could’ve teamed up because if there’s one thing worse than being a political assassin it’s being a bad friend. Instead, Gianini dies in a fight that could politely be called anti-climactic. I’m also a big fan of political assassination double crosses where the people that hire you betray you, but since all the offending action takes place off-screen it really has no effect on my Achilles heel. Also, Alan Simpson is just a plain bad writer. Where the hell was Rob Kerchner (writer since part four) that he couldn’t be around to at least let the franchise limp away with a little dignity?

Don “the Dragon” Wilson as charismatic as he is, can only do so much with one note when no one else around him is even trying. John Patrick White is beyond dreadful as Wilson’s son Chris, he comes across as a whiner but also inexplicably has the ability to create dangerous weapons using everyday household appliances, he’s like MacGyver and the Anarchist Cookbook, but with a vagina. There’s even a couple of one scene wonders who deliver their lines with the same degree of conviction and professional training as the guy from “Sudden Death” who says, “You’ll what… burn my toast?” then laughs maniacally.

The action scenes are also worse than perfunctory, no flair, no fun. Choreography has never been the strong suit of this particular franchise ut this whole affair is so devoid of anything worthwhile that not even the lish greens of Ireland can mask how big a hack job this is. I can’t believe my loyalty gets rewarded like this.

Bloodfist 2050 aka Bloodfist IX aka Bloodfist: The Don “the Dragon” Wilson-less Experience [**1/2]
The first “Bloodfist” film without Don “the Dragon” Wilson and the last one ever made to boot is basically a rehash of the first film (right down to the mentor/villain double whammy) except set in a post apocalyptic Los Angeles where the only spot in the entire city that looks anything like civilization as we know it is the hero’s apartment.

Opening with a firefight, a few explosions and then a car chase where all the vehicles look like something out of “Mad Max,” the film seems to boast the aesthetics of an early 80s actioneer right down to the quality of the film stock and even how Los Angeles looks a little something John Carpenter might have cooked up in his “Escape from New York” heyday or “The Warriors.” Maybe the intention whether the film turned out good or bad was to honor these films. I guess it works pretty well, it’s definitely a fun kind of bad. It certainly made enough appeals to my “Bloodfist,” “Warriors” and “Escape from New York” loving side, there’s set design that works really well, a couple of good fights and even an absence of a great villain.

So our hero is Alex Danko (Matt Mullins), a kid from out of town who after an epic skirmish decides to visit his brother in bombed out Los Angeles (some of the exterior shots look like a fire ravaged shoebox diorama) only to find that he’s a pit fighter recently killed outside of a strip club by a mysterious black clad figure. Under the tutelage of a homicide cop/ pit fighter enthusiast named Marino (Joe Sabatino) snd his brother’s best buddy Rabid Randy (Glenn Meadows), Alex trains and infiltrates the circuit while theories are tossed around, but no really solid investigative work is done. It is all based on his brother’s prowess in the ring, his esteem among fellow fighters and the general bad ass nature of the now most dangerous fighter in the sport, the Great Ahmed Khan (Monsour Del Rosario).

The fights outside of the ring in “Bloodfist 2050” are more of the kind of prowess demonstrating spectacle we’ve grown accustomed to as our martial arts films get more spectacular. Weapons are brandished, lots of flipping and kicking in mid-air occurs but the tournament fights are more of (but not entirely comprised of) the “I kick and then you kick and I kick and then you kick” variety of choreography that was prevalent through the “Bloodfist” series and American martial arts films in general. Still it is easily the best work in the entire series.

In furthering their belief that the only thing you can do to the first “Bloodfist” film is improve it, the filmmakers have decided to make a visit to the strip club mandatory after every two action scenes, so we get some vital and necessary breasts, but we also get to address the elephant in the room: which is that Matt Mullins, a five time world martial arts champion, looks like he could be the lead in a softcore skin flick. Another genre I think the filmmakers intended to pay their respects to with this film. Mullins certainly has the physical prowess, but he plays the role just stoic enough that it’s difficult to say if his acting is better than or just barely good enough to land him a softcore role.

Also, whether we acknowledge it or not the filmmakers are teaching us valubale lessons about judging things by what they appear to be. Ahmed Khan is an intimidating fighter and he brutally murdered somebody, but he gets taken out easily by the hero… too easily to be the bad guy. The MC (perennial “Bloodfist” favorite Joe Marí Avellan) looks like an untrustworthy guy who strokes his cheek out of what looks like worry and diabolical scheming, but he also hates illegal gambling and appears to have been a fan of our hero’s brother. So we learned that these two scary dudes are actually stand-up individuals who sometimes do their jobs to excess. We also learn that the best place to leave your car in L.A. is with a blind man that carries a giant stick and most of all, just because you’re a martial arts film doesn’t mean you can’t also have some pretty decent simulated sex.

I’m also glad they stopped it here, because this was just different enough that I don’t know if I could ever let it go back to being the same thing.


Dave said...

Hey, crustaceanhate here. I've never understood the title to this series. Bloodsport, Kickboxer, NRNS, Ring of Fire; they are pretty self explanatory, but what the hell is a Bloodfist? Anyway, nice job with the reviews, they were a fun read. Hope you didn't watch the whole series in one sitting because I think that could break your brain.

brandoncurtis said...

Thanks for the visit and the following Dave. I wanted "Bloodfist" to be about lesbian kickboxers, to me that is the only way the title could possibly make sense.